It is unbelievable that it is 11 months since I heard you voice. I want so bad to hear you or feel you, but it will never happen again. I almost asked a close friend to watch some videos I have of you because I wanted to see you and hear you but I don't know if I'm ready for that. This picture was in Jamaica a few weeks before I lost you, we sat and wathced the sunset with Doug and Steph talking about so many things, including bringing the boys back to Jamaica. That was an amazing vacation for us and I am so glad we had it. I remember a number of things that almost cancelled that trip and you kept saying put it off if we need to and I was determined that we needed that vacation no matter what. So glad we did it! We laid on the beach and talked, smiled and laughed.
The year is coming so fast and I thought I wanted it to hurry and past so it wouldn't hurt so bad but I'm figuring out that feeling anything is better then nothing at all. I can't even imagine looking back and it being 5 or 10 years, that makes me not breathe. So today I will continue to take it a day at a time and continue to let the wonderful people in my life help me do that and learn to live. I already had some text this morning, you are still in so many people hearts and minds. I miss you babe, please continue to watch over our boys and help them. They do not even realize what today is but they will know the year because poor Ethan will never forget the day after his birthday.
No comments:
Post a Comment