Friday, September 21, 2012 Stay Positive...

Life is Good... That has been a hard one for me for a long time but today I choose to make it a good day and look at all the good things in my life. Call it me being positive or me being an optimism, whatever you want but I choose to make it good. In my life it is so easy to focus on all the bad and let it bring me to my knees all the time but I decided something last night, it is my choice to make of it what I want. Today I want to be happy and smile so that is what I am doing, it makes me feel good and it makes my boys happy. Especially when I am smiling in the morning and fixing them a good hot breakfast.
I think we all could easily look at all the bad that life tosses in our path and it has done that to us this past year but what we do with that is our choice. I am not promising I will be like this every day, if you follow my blog I have these ups and downs but I also am finding a place where I am happy with myself and that is something I have battled with for a while. In all this I had to find myself again and be okay with me and being on my own and I am getting there. I mean I have amazing friends and family in my life that help me along the way but in the end it is me on my own feet, it is all that I have struggled for the past year to have my life and give my boys a life. It is never going to be the life Derek and I planned but it can still be a different but good life. Those two boys of ours deserve that and much more. So try to focus on the good in life and don't let all the bad that goes on out there bring you to your knees, God knows there is plenty and most of it we have NO control over. Control, yeah there is a struggle in itself, I wish I could control my life but I have figured out that I only have so much, the rest well it is what it is...
So find some happiness in your life, if I can do it after everything that has happen to us then you have to be able to find some in your own life. It doesn't make the bad go away but it helps you learn to heal, be happy and be stronger, and that's all you have in this life. That's what our loved one that are gone would want for us and God knows I know way to many people that know about lose these days. Because no matter what we do it doesn't change the bad and that is what I had to finally figure out, there is no changing the outcome no matter how much I cry or how sad I am, no going back to change it. So hug your family and friends, tell someone you love them or what they mean to your life. Live Life, it is all up to you and your choice!!! What other choice do you have.
I lost an amazing husband way too soon and I will miss him every day of my life and love him till I die and see him again. But I have two amazing boys that need a happy strong mom. Two boys that are so much like their daddy that it brings a smile to my face as I type this. I choice to be happy, and I have two amazing boys that make that a little easier plus we have an amazing man in heaven looking over us. So here's to a good day...