Sunday, May 20, 2012 Bittersweet...

Well here I am, laying in my bed with my mind racing with mixed feelings. Ethan officially slept in his bed for the first time by himself since the accident. It's a little bittersweet for me, it has always been nice to not sleep here alone but I know it is good for him. So now I have to get use to waking up alone in the morning, even if it was to a 8 year old, my mom or my many friends that have just been here for support. My favorite thing is waking up and rolling over to snuggle up or waking up with an arm around you, that is a wonderful feeling a miss right now.
Yesterday was a good day, boys had a good night at NaNa's while I had some time out. Picked them up and headed to their last soccer game in the heat, then back to the house with friends to swim the day away and grill out. We sat and talked about a lot of things and it was good. It was nice but at the end of the day still missing things.
Realized today after some thinking and talking with Angela that sometimes people aren't who you thought they were, that can sometimes in my world be a good or bad thing. For me during all this some people have surprised me, hurt me, and loved me but every time it is different when you realize things about people. I think some people don't realize the impact they have on people's life, I see it in my life and other peoples life daily. The good people will make major difference in your life, the bad people will too but in a different way, as a lesson. Some are not bad people but they still always leave scars and never even realize it because they never really think about their actions or impact that they make in people's life for whatever reason.
In the end I appreciate the people in my life and the friendships I have that help me get up and face the world. Life doesn't always give us what we want but what we decide to do with it is what matters in the end. Even the bad stuff it hands us. So think before you speak and act towards people. Think before you even walk into someone's life and really make a good difference, because it could mean a lot. Love your family and friends.