Thursday, August 15, 2013 One of those days...

Monday, August 5, 2013 Flashbacks...

Been a while since I have posted or wanted to but my head seems to be spinning tonight so I figure I'll give it a try. Life is flying by this summer with the boys and all, school starts Wednesday and soccer starts tomorrow. Sometimes I wonder if I can keep up with it all some days but I manage as I know I have to.
Flashbacks have been a little off and on lately, I mean I've always had them for two years, some of that day, some of different times before and after the accident. Some are more detailed then others. But there seems to be different triggers these days and it is the smallest things that will make me stop in my tracks or sometimes I am able to just shake them off. Most of the time it is when I am driving. Like when I was driving back from Gulf Shores we past this exit and I had a car on either side of me and wow there it hit, I could see that Hyundai emblem on the car. I slowed a little and tried to shake it but it took me back to that day and flying through the air, every smell, sound and sight right in my face. I was able to handle it and shake it off but it got me remembering and thinking for a while. In time I get my mind back on the present and all is well. Guess I will always have those hit me here and there. The newest one is at home, been happening since the day we got home from vacation, I walked into the house and smelled my vanilla air freshener, same one I have used for year and have had here but for some reason that day it made me about vomit because it made me flashback to coming back into this house everyday from the hospital or wherever mom and Kim would get me out to. It reminded me of being wheeled out by ambulance out the front door right past that air freshener and it being the last smell of home and the first smell when I get home. Thought it was just once but for some reason every time I get a smell of it the past couple weeks it makes me sick and my skin crawl so I bought a new scent the other day. We will see if it helps!!! I hope so!
All and all we are doing good, the flashbacks and everything will come and go but in the end we choose to move forward and keep healing and growing. We will always have good and bad memories, we will hold tight to the good ones and try to make it through the bad. We will make new good memories and enjoy every day we have together.